I hit this keyboard a few times a week now. Exploring, asking, sharing, therapising (that’s a word, isn’t it?). What’s become interesting to me, is that this weekly post, about an Act of Kindness, is the one that I spend the most time worrying about whether or not what I’ve done is “good enough”.
It’s like I’ve created some previously unexplored standard, above which an act must fall, before it can be shared as an act of kindness.
My little blogspace is filled with words I feel compelled to write. I hear some words, a phrase or feel something flow through me, and I know that next time I sit ready to tap away on the keyboard they will be enough. I have the same feeling with my Kindness post, but then my mind steps in saying “That’s not enough. It’s not an act worth talking about because everyone should do it”.
So today, I decided. From here, all Kindness posts will have the same essence as my other posts. I’ll simply share what I feel urged to share, regardless of whether or not it is a “kindness” worthy of sharing.
For this week, my kindness has been the gift of time for family. My Uncle Neil has recently had some news that means we are now talking “cancer battle”. Really, I just want to say Fuck Cancer, but that would be inappropriate.
Anyway, after I heard the news, I slept on it, before shooting him a text. When he gave me a call (which completely made my day, by the way) I did my best to listen. Although I’m sure I said a lot (you can see here, I love me some words!!), I tried to shut up and listen. I heard heartfelt words from my uncle that I wished I had never had to hear. Tumours. Pain. Chemo.
A few days later, Dean and I took the afternoon off from the ever present daily grind of work, to go and spend some time with my Aunt and my Uncle and my Cousin.
I’m also deliberately choosing to do what I can to support my cousin in the background. Texting. Making jokes. Sharing links. Reminding him to breathe.
Kindness is what it is. We all know it when we feel it. I felt this as I gave it, and I felt as I saw it reciprocated this weekend. Thanks Wade.
Give yourself a moment to feel the kindness around you. It has a nice taste of life about it.