Monthly Archives: October 2013

Living. Loving. Laughing.

Saturday began with the harshest of realities. The release of my Mum’s ashes to the ocean. For me, that was the line in the sand. I had made a decision beforehand.  Once we had released Mum, it was time for … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 6 Comments

Release

I feel like my words are ruining this post.   Because my words will never be enough. Instead of reading this post, I ask that you feel your way. Today, my Dad, my sisters and I were together with Mum … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Preparing for Goodbye

How do you prepare for a last Goodbye? I probably never knew, and I certainly don’t know now.  Even though I’ve tried at least 4 times now. Somehow, Mum knew how to do it beautifully. On the Wednesday before Mum … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 7 Comments

Forgetting to be Present

I have found myself feeling like a jetlagged reluctant time traveller today.  My mind has taken me back before Mum’s death, and then thrown me into the future when she will have been long gone. And each of those places … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 9 Comments

“How are you doing?”

I am so blessed that I have people around me who care enough to ask. Only thing is, I have no idea how to answer them. I hear myself saying “I’m ok”, then I feel a bit fake because I’m … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | 7 Comments

Shop Crying. And the impossibility of Choosing.

It seems that grief has triggered a new and special skill. I am dubbing it “shop crying”. Suzie has already told me about her sudden introduction to this completely uncool and more than mildly embarrassing event. Late last week she … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments

Messy. On the Inside.

Today was a tough day. I had been reasonably alright for a few days. In fact my last tough day was Thursday.  At the time I thought it was because I kept replaying that just the week before was Mum’s … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 14 Comments